MASTERbation: Let it All Hang Out
An unconventional journey through womb health & sexual satisfaction through self.
Step 2: Let It All Hang Out!
We bury pain and mourn it like a lost loved one.
When in reality, pain is to be felt and released, like a dove. A lot of us have traumas that cause sexual satisfaction to be underachieved. These traumas enter our minds and cause feelings of discomfort, embarrassment, hurt and other feelings that we shadow for our own security and well-being. The time is now to uncover and face whatever inhibits you from having full, well-rounded experiences.
Feel you to heal you...
When it comes to self-healing, I'm a big advocate of listening to your inner self. I know this can sound daunting and unrealistic to some, but hear me out. Have you ever been through a traumatic event and told yourself, "I'm ok"? In that very moment, you did a soft reset on your emotions and told yourself to move past this NOW. Do not feel the feelings you already feel leaking through, let it go. Why do we do that to ourselves? (I'm rambling but follow me, I have a point. Get into this, it's a process and we all have perfect imperfections! Feel this flow with me.) We do this to protect ourselves because we feel that we cannot handle the emotions that come with whatever traumatic event we're enduring. We aren't fully trusting in our ability to digest the feelings we naturally feel. Now, this is a generalization, some of us can handle it and let those emotions release however they need to and I applaud that level of self-understanding. This is for those of us who let things go almost instantly out of fear of how deep our feelings can take us. Fear that we may never be able to close Pandora's box, once opened. I'm here (as proof) to tell you that the labyrinth is navigational. I can't lie and tell you that it won't be difficult, it will be, but you've made it this far and this is the first step to release.
Let's try something... Got some paper and a pen? Write a list of all of the things you would do if you were to achieve a specific goal (Example: fitness/health goals, finance goals, professional goals). Here's mine:
If I were to lose 20 pounds I'd....
1. Buy a cute bikini
2. Run a 10k
3. Take a pole fitness class
Ok, now, write another list under it and list reasons why you cannot do these things, here's the kicker, 1 rule... you CANNOT list the goal as a reason (Wrong Example: I can't buy a bikini because I need to lose 20 pounds). Here's mine:
1. I cannot buy a bikini because I'm not comfortable showing off my body
2. I cannot run a 10k because I am afraid I will fail
3. I cannot take a pole fitness class because I'm afraid others may make fun of the way I look
I'm sure some of you see where I'm going with this, but let's keep diving, I want you to further dissect these reasons. Form each of these answers as a question and answer them as eloquently as possible, same rule applies! Mine again:
1. I'm not comfortable showing off my body because I feel as though others will find my appearance off-putting or may say hurtful things about me behind my back.
2. I am afraid to fail because I want to be able to keep up with the other people running the race and don't want to be judged for not completing the race or coming in last.
3. I'm afraid of others making fun of my appearance because I'm uncomfortable with my own appearance.
You can keep diving or stop here. Now that these feelings are fully exposed and raw, they are physically here and we can truly feel and sort through them.
Here are some great questions to ask and answer for yourself :
Who first imposed these ideals on us?
When did you first feel this way?
What event solidified the validity in these ideals?
How can these ideals be invalidated?
Who do we see or know that is proving these ideals wrong?
Answer these questions and see how you feel about the results. Those journals will come in handy! I love writing as a medium to self-healing and womb-healing because it gets your feelings down on paper and physically available. Phones and laptops are great but pen and paper carry more emotion (in my opinion). At the end of this journey, these journals will be burned, so I recommend something cheap like a black and white composition notebook.
Always remember, your emotions and feelings are valid when you feel them SO FEEL THEM, understand and dissect them and then you can truly release them.
Homework:
Feel Test
You'll Need:
A feather
A silk scarf
Ice
Warm uncooked rice
Warm(er) oil
After a warm soak and thorough moisturizing, lay on your bed (protect with an old towel or sheet) and have a feel test (or sensory tasting). Touch each item to your skin in different places and take note of how each item feels. Try to use words other than: hot, cold, soft, warm, tickles or stings. Think hard and write down your answers, be vivid and detailed. Try different combinations and amounts of items and BE CREATIVE. Allow yourself to feel everything.
If you would like to share your completed homework, tag @thehauxhive in pictures on instagram or use hashtag #thehauxhivehomework to have your work featured in the next episode of MASTERbation!
Love, ATW